Through It All still

So I have 2 days left here in Virginia. On Friday I will be on my way to my new home in Brooklyn. I'm living with family there so I won't be alone. However, I am leaving my Mommy, Lil Brother, and my Big Sister Ebony.

I am going to miss them all dearly, but especially Ebony. I know that's kind of harsh but we are super close. She's my best friend/better half/ partner in crime/Ace/ right hand.. (you get the picture)

She told me she is going to miss me too. But, today I felt otherwise. I feel like I annoy her sometimes and she does talk to me like a little kid. We have been arguing like crazy lately. Maybe because subconsciously we are mad we are parting.

I swear I love being up under her. I look up to her regardless of all her decisions and mistakes. She is the effin coolest. I love her so much but she cut me deep. She was leaving the house when I was pulling up. I asked her, "where you going?" She said, "I'm about to go to the movies."

Of course I wanted to go.. but to make a long story short I had to pee and she didn't want to wait for me. She didn't text me or call me to ask if I wanted to go. She said, "I just want to go by myself."

Yup she pulled my heart right outta my chest. It may seem small to you, but to me every single second counts for me. Because come next week I can't tweet her or text her and say "Okay see ya when you get home, or wanna come to the store with me?"

Those are the little moments and outings I enjoy and look forward to. I almost cried when she turned me down. I TRULY understand that sometimes that people need time to themselves when they are going through some things, but why this week?

I know I could be wrong and seem selfish but could one not think the same for her. I don't know who is wrong here. Of course I still love her to death and I forgive her....

we been doing it BIG since the beginning

And still do NOW